Just don't know what to do
by PearHead Minako
Summary: Azalea still rules over Orphen, but can Cleao overcome it? OxC! First one!


PHM: A new genre for me. MY first ORPHEN fic! Yuppers! One of my favorite animes now. Tehehe. I guess I tribute this to RJ. It's all his fault anyway. ~.^  
  
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Azalea. It's all her damn fault. She created this entire mess, even if that particular stunt is over; it's still her fault.  
  
She tainted *him*, she tainted his soul with her words...her hatred. Her love. She did this to him. She created the monster he's become.  
  
Orphen. My beloved Orphen. He doesn't speak that much anymore. I try to get through to him, to speak some words of encouragement or comfort, but he doesn't respond. He just walks on, seeming to notice nothing of the beautiful surroundings around him and his partners. I can't get through to him. I can't do anything. I am, for once, at a loss for what to do.  
  
So, here we are, heading towards nowhere in particular. It's just the three of us, Orphen, Majic and I. The trees here are huge, not as huge as that sequoia with the giant bugs -Double Eww- but it is surely up there with the tallest. The flowers smell faintly of sugar, sweet yet spicy, and I can't help but reach out and pluck a couple. A bird chirps curiously at me, Leki barking at it with a happy voice. A smile crosses my lips despite the feelings of loneliness that seems to drown my soul in depression. I just want to be with Orphen. I just want to keep him safe, to let no more harm come to him ever again. The flowers grow suddenly, wrapping around my wrists and trailing up my arm; A nice arm brace to add to my dress.  
  
Suddenly a though strikes my mind and I grip the flowers a little tighter, pulling out the rest of the free ones that had not wrapped around my arm. I'll give them to Orphen.  
  
I jump up, noticing that Orphen and Majic had been so avidly talking about the Winds spell that they had not noticed my disappearance, surprising since sometimes I can't shut up. Maybe they just ignore me. Running to catch up, Leki bouncing happily beside me on the dirt ground, I catch up to them.  
  
"Here!" I say, standing in front of Orphen and holding out the flowers to him. My eyes are locked with his, noticing his shocked expression before his mask appeared to cover it up. Yet, underneath I noticed that he seemed sad, like I had just handed him his death contract. His deep eyes, filled with so much hidden pain, seemed to scream out at me as he tried to answer. I felt my smile fade, slip from my face as though water washed over me. I had hurt him.  
  
I always seemed to hurt him nowadays. I don't really know or understand how, but I know that somehow, I say something, or do something, or get to close to him, that he can't stand it. Just like now. He didn't say anything to me, simply looked away from me, perhaps at an awaiting Azalea with open arms and walked on. Majic seemed to pity me, one thing that I can't stand, before hastily dropping his gaze and chasing after Orphen, the heavy backpack banging against his back.  
  
I don't know what to do anymore. I don't like to see Orphen like this. Doesn't he understand what he's doing to me? Why can't he see it? Of course, it's because of Azalea. It's always Azalea. My hand stands still outstretched in front of me, the flowers wilting in my hand. Tears had begun to flow down my face, covering my face with more water, for moments ago it had begun to rain.  
  
I can't remember how long I stood there, waiting for something to get me, some monster to eat me. But I didn't care. Orphen didn't care, so I didn't. If Orphen wasn't happy, then I won't be either. Leki played in front of me for a while before bounding away towards who knows what. I don't even chase him.  
  
Darkness envelops me, surrounding me in an eerie glow of light that pulsated around the forest. It made me shiver. I stood up, my back creaking from sitting so long. I suddenly realized I was lost. Majic had the map, Leki had the sense, and Orphen had the magic. I was screwed.  
  
"Don't cry, you little weakling! Just think..." I told myself, my arms crossing on my chest. "I can't think! He's there! He's always there..." I broke down, falling hard on my knees. I screamed. I screamed until my throat hurt. I just didn't care any longer.  
  
-He doesn't care. Why can't I understand this? He cares about Azalea, not about stupid, little old me. But, his smile. Oh, when he smiles! I know he still has some of the good, kind Orphen inside him-  
  
My mind ran over some of the times we spent together, some of the times that he protected me...that I even protected him. I still can't believe he was willing to kill himself for Azalea. I couldn't stand it. I wanted to die when he held that sword in the air, the white magic cracking against it. I wanted to die...sometimes, I wished I had. He still doesn't care about me. He never will.  
  
"Cleao." A voice called out to me. A voice that was so very familiar. I had tasted this voice before. I needed this voice one again. It was strong, supporting, caring. I looked up, my blue eyes red from crying, my hair probably matted with mud. It was Orphen. I wanted to run. "Cleao..." He said again before I felt him wrap his strong arms around my body.  
  
I didn't want him touching me. I didn't want him near me anymore. He was killing me. He was killing me slowly...and how it hurt. I struggled against him, struggled against his arms, until...until his soft lips touched mine. They were sweet, though salty from my tears, and I found myself responding to him. But, wait, that's not right.  
  
He loves Azalea.  
  
I pushed against him once more, his arms finally breaking their embrace, his lips parting from my own. His dark gaze was sad, hurt, but in a different kind of pain. I didn't know what to do, put I had gotten quite used to letting impulse rule my life. I run into things, I'm blonde, and I am therefore qualified to be confused beyond measure. My own blue eyes washed over him, and in his hand he held my flowers. He had picked them up off the muddy ground and now held them close to his heart.  
  
I had been wrong.  
  
He reached once more towards me, his hand resting softly upon my cheek, my curly blond hair whisking against his hand. I leaned into his stroke and faintly I heard him speak. "I'm so sorry, Cleao. I love Azalea. Or, I thought I did. Now that I think about it, I realize I never knew Azalea. Obviously, I had been wrong." He smiled, his hand dropping back to his side. "Cleao, I was wrong the whole time. I realize now how much I've been hurting you. But you've...you've got to understand..." His voice faded then, and I felt my raw throat begin to answer.  
  
"Orphen," My voice was weak, a mere whisper on the wind. "Orphen, I know. I know. I just...I can't stand it. I can't stand being around you when you don't talk to me. Don't look at me. I want you to myself. I..." I felt my voice stop as a mouth closed once more upon my own. I closed my eyes, feeling the love that seemed to radiate from the sorcerer next to me.  
  
"That's where you're wrong Cleao." Orphen said, his voice livelier, happier, more like the Orphen I loved. He picked up my hand and looked into my confused cobalt gaze. "That's why I should tell you that I haven't been able to look at you...at you....because..." Orphen was stuttering! And! He was blushing! Oh, I felt a witty remark come to mind, but before I could say it, he spoke once more. "I haven't been able to look at you, Cleao, 'cause I've realized that I love you back. I guess I'm just to dense to notice."  
  
Once again, I had no idea what to do.  
  
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PHM: Ok, a little predictable, sorry! But, they *had* to end up together! They had too! Well, Review please, f you want I mean.... 


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